I hope everyone had a good Christmas. Got everything they wanted, got to spend it with people they love, and or at least had some snow, something I was lacking spending Christmas back home in Ohio. Maybe you even got to kiss a special girl under the mistletoe. Hopefully you are preparing for the new year now, and something important that comes with it-
Resolutions.
Maybe you resolve to lose a little weight, eat out a little less, spend a little less, or if you're very frugal then spend a little more, get out more, spend more time with your family, or maybe, just maybe, to get a girlfriend. Whatever it may be I wish you well in keeping up with it for a whole year. As it is the holiday season I am short on time and must go, but enjoy your New Year, and the few days you may have off from work.
Stay gay and happy blogging,
Kat
Monday, December 26, 2011
Thursday, December 1, 2011
In Love With A Straight Girl
Heart pounding, mind racing, I stared into her big brown eyes and tried to keep my focus on something, anything, other than the fact that I was completely in love with her, but alas, my efforts were futile, for she was all I ever thought about even when she wasn't standing two feet away.
Straight girls. They're everywhere. I truly believe their sole purpose is to break our hearts. At one point or another, every lesbian has had some mad love for a straight girl. Why, though? Why do we fall in love when we know we'll just end up hurt, that they can never love us back? Most times, it's because we can't help it.
Recently, I fell head over heels for a straight girl. I began a job at a local ice cream shop where she herself works too. I remember the first time I worked with her, it was one of our special weekends, 50's Weekend. Special items were on sale for what they would have been in the fifties, and we had the whole place decorated. We even had a jukebox outside. I remember working the same window as her.
Now when I had started working at this place, I had been worried, it was an all girl staff and I did not want to fall for a coworker. But alas, I needed a job, and so I had to. The biggest mistake I make that day was labeling her as a girl I would never fall for. She just wasn't my type. Or so I thought. But telling myself I would never love her was like asking karma to make a fool out of me once more.
A week passed before we worked together again. We worked with two other people, and she cheerfully insisted we work at the same window once again. We had a fun night, at one point I was competing with the people at the other window for customers, and later she and I were singing together. It was magical. And I thought she was totally awesome. In my head I moved her to the work friend zone, where I intended for her to stay.
At home I lay in bed, thinking of how awesome she was, and being the shy girl I was, I was glad she was so nice to me. Then a thought entered my mind, What if I like her? I brushed the thought away under the mental file of-totally crazy unrealistic shit. But as the weeks went by and we had yet to work together again, my feelings grew in her absence. I was in full blown denial by then, swearing to myself I didn't like her. And then one day I finally admitted it to myself.
I had been nervous to work with her since I had officially had a crush on her, but we did anyways, and ever since then I have only come to love her more each day.
I know what some of you are thinking: So where does all this heartbreak come in?
For a while after I realized I had a super-crush on her, I fantasized of my life with her during my daydreaming time. It was like I was carrying out the non-existent relationship in my head. She had never talked about guys, and that filled me with much hope that there was a small sliver of a chance she was gay. Until the night the shit hit the fan.
I was sitting at home in my pajamas, relaxing, when I got a text from one of my good friends. I just saw Rachel* kissing a guy, she wrote. I cried the whole night.
I still didn't stop loving her after that. I saw her one time and she hugged me; I didn't stop smiling the whole day. I'm still in love with her, and will be for a while. It's gonna really suck in March when the shop opens up again and I have to work with her, but until then, I'm officially trying to avoid her.
Just another story of a heartbreaker straight girl.
So what's your story? Share your straight girl love, and remember to watch out for them, because they'll hurt you BAD.
Stay gay and happy blogging,
-Kat
*Not her actual name
Straight girls. They're everywhere. I truly believe their sole purpose is to break our hearts. At one point or another, every lesbian has had some mad love for a straight girl. Why, though? Why do we fall in love when we know we'll just end up hurt, that they can never love us back? Most times, it's because we can't help it.
Recently, I fell head over heels for a straight girl. I began a job at a local ice cream shop where she herself works too. I remember the first time I worked with her, it was one of our special weekends, 50's Weekend. Special items were on sale for what they would have been in the fifties, and we had the whole place decorated. We even had a jukebox outside. I remember working the same window as her.
Now when I had started working at this place, I had been worried, it was an all girl staff and I did not want to fall for a coworker. But alas, I needed a job, and so I had to. The biggest mistake I make that day was labeling her as a girl I would never fall for. She just wasn't my type. Or so I thought. But telling myself I would never love her was like asking karma to make a fool out of me once more.
A week passed before we worked together again. We worked with two other people, and she cheerfully insisted we work at the same window once again. We had a fun night, at one point I was competing with the people at the other window for customers, and later she and I were singing together. It was magical. And I thought she was totally awesome. In my head I moved her to the work friend zone, where I intended for her to stay.
At home I lay in bed, thinking of how awesome she was, and being the shy girl I was, I was glad she was so nice to me. Then a thought entered my mind, What if I like her? I brushed the thought away under the mental file of-totally crazy unrealistic shit. But as the weeks went by and we had yet to work together again, my feelings grew in her absence. I was in full blown denial by then, swearing to myself I didn't like her. And then one day I finally admitted it to myself.
I had been nervous to work with her since I had officially had a crush on her, but we did anyways, and ever since then I have only come to love her more each day.
I know what some of you are thinking: So where does all this heartbreak come in?
For a while after I realized I had a super-crush on her, I fantasized of my life with her during my daydreaming time. It was like I was carrying out the non-existent relationship in my head. She had never talked about guys, and that filled me with much hope that there was a small sliver of a chance she was gay. Until the night the shit hit the fan.
I was sitting at home in my pajamas, relaxing, when I got a text from one of my good friends. I just saw Rachel* kissing a guy, she wrote. I cried the whole night.
I still didn't stop loving her after that. I saw her one time and she hugged me; I didn't stop smiling the whole day. I'm still in love with her, and will be for a while. It's gonna really suck in March when the shop opens up again and I have to work with her, but until then, I'm officially trying to avoid her.
Just another story of a heartbreaker straight girl.
So what's your story? Share your straight girl love, and remember to watch out for them, because they'll hurt you BAD.
Stay gay and happy blogging,
-Kat
*Not her actual name
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